BEAR HUG - THE REAL McCOY*
FRIENDSHIP
WHAT IT IS &
WHAT IT ISN'T
Whether merely friends or friends +, walking hand in hand through life is a beautiful thing to behold. Shame so few know how to do it or what friendship REALLY MEANS.
_________________________
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To my way of thinking, one of the saddest things I have ever seen is what I see in
Social Media, such as FaceBook
& Twitter regarding
'FRIENDS' & 'FOLLOWERS'.
Social Media, such as FaceBook
& Twitter regarding
'FRIENDS' & 'FOLLOWERS'.
What has happened to those terms that they have become so distorted as to be virtually meaningless and no longer bear any relation to the original meanings.
Some people will come visit you
in jail.
A FRIEND...
will be in there with you,
singing songs
and acting the fool.
in jail.
A FRIEND...
will be in there with you,
singing songs
and acting the fool.
Some people will hang on
your every word,
as long as you are 'fun'.
A FRIEND...
will hang with you,
for as long as you both have breath.
your every word,
as long as you are 'fun'.
A FRIEND...
will hang with you,
for as long as you both have breath.
Some people will at times
judge you and
judge you and
make you feel small.
A FRIEND...
will NEVER judge you and
will always be looking for ways
to support you
and lift you up.
A FRIEND...
will NEVER judge you and
will always be looking for ways
to support you
and lift you up.
WHICH DO YOU WANT?
I am always amazed when I realize that especially on Twitter you can buy...
followers.
followers.
Yep. You can BUY followers.
Good God.
Nothing new about that sad to say but it to me has always been distasteful and indeed SMARMY.
So what if you have ten thousand followers? What kind of relationship can you have with that many people, and are you that needy or lack self-confidence to the point that having 10,000 followers assuages your ego sufficiently to make you feel good about yourself? Does your life only have meaning if you have hordes of people in your contact list? That is the 21st Century equivalent of the old
'notches on the bedpost' syndrome...
and hey...
At least with that you got sex
out of the deal. LOL.
Good God.
Nothing new about that sad to say but it to me has always been distasteful and indeed SMARMY.
So what if you have ten thousand followers? What kind of relationship can you have with that many people, and are you that needy or lack self-confidence to the point that having 10,000 followers assuages your ego sufficiently to make you feel good about yourself? Does your life only have meaning if you have hordes of people in your contact list? That is the 21st Century equivalent of the old
'notches on the bedpost' syndrome...
and hey...
At least with that you got sex
out of the deal. LOL.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE QUALITY
OF YOUR RELATIONSHIPS?
OF YOUR RELATIONSHIPS?
There is a sad truth. No one can possibly have any sort of meaningful relationship with several thousand people simultaneously. So what is the point? & why does anyone want to 'follow' someone who never acknowledges you, never or rarely talks to you, and in no way ever demonstrates any caring whatsoever about you. So, I guess that isn't it. You are nothing more than a number to someone with that many 'friends'. What in hell meaning does THAT have...and let's be clear.
STOP using the term FRIEND to describe whatever the hell that is,
cause FRIENDSHIP? IT ISN'T!
STOP using the term FRIEND to describe whatever the hell that is,
cause FRIENDSHIP? IT ISN'T!
A FRIEND...
will listen to you.
Listen and never judge.
Will be there for you, no matter what.
A FRIEND...
will take time for you even when they
really don't have the time.
Long after the lights have gone out
on all those other 'relationships',
the one you have with a friend
will be burning brightly.
You can say anything to them.
Vent, cry, scream & holler, laugh,
play the fool, and in short be yourself
and that is ok with a friend
'cause they know they can with you too.
THAT is friendship.
will listen to you.
Listen and never judge.
Will be there for you, no matter what.
A FRIEND...
will take time for you even when they
really don't have the time.
Long after the lights have gone out
on all those other 'relationships',
the one you have with a friend
will be burning brightly.
You can say anything to them.
Vent, cry, scream & holler, laugh,
play the fool, and in short be yourself
and that is ok with a friend
'cause they know they can with you too.
THAT is friendship.
THIS OTHER
'FOLLOWER/FRIEND' BULLSHIT
MAY BE SOMETHING,
BUT FRIENDSHIP IT IS NOT!
THE FRIEND WHO WILL UNFRIEND AND BLOCK OVER THE LEAST LITTLE THING IS NOT A FRIEND...
and NEVER WAS.
'FOLLOWER/FRIEND' BULLSHIT
MAY BE SOMETHING,
BUT FRIENDSHIP IT IS NOT!
THE FRIEND WHO WILL UNFRIEND AND BLOCK OVER THE LEAST LITTLE THING IS NOT A FRIEND...
and NEVER WAS.
Trust me, when the chips are down and the rubber meets the road and the shit hits the fan, you want a real friend by your side and a real friend WILL BE.
Those others? They will in all likelihood be gone. If you aren't being FUN? They will disappear like wisps of cartoon smoke...and YOU, my friend, will find yourself ALONE.
ALL ALONE. SADLY ALONE,
and if you haven't set aside
a garden place, planted your seed
of friendship there, and invited someone in
to share it WITH you, there will never be anything there that will EVER bloom.
Too many people today invite the hangers-on. The groupies, the other shallow folks...because a relationship (if you can call it that) with those of that ilk is seemingly easier. No muss. No fuss. No work.
Sorry, friendship like anything else in life that is truly worthwhile TAKES WORK. Yes it does.
It takes work, dedication, commitment, time and effort. Sorry, but that is the way it is.
Sorry, friendship like anything else in life that is truly worthwhile TAKES WORK. Yes it does.
It takes work, dedication, commitment, time and effort. Sorry, but that is the way it is.
Having a successful ANYTHING. A business, a marriage, a career. ANYTHING. It takes work, and it takes YOU doing it. It cannot be farmed out to some Twitter follower SERVICE to find your fulfillment for you. It takes YOU doing, befriending, caring, engaging with someone else. PUTTING UP with their flaws and failings and shortcomings and BULLSHIT, just like they put up with yours.
IF YOU WANT A FRIEND...BE ONE
is the old saying...and it's true.
IF YOU WANT A FRIEND...BE ONE
is the old saying...and it's true.
If you want assurance for yourself that someone will be there for you when the shit
hits the fan, you better be there for someone else when it does that FOR THEM.
hits the fan, you better be there for someone else when it does that FOR THEM.
NEVER ask someone else to do something for you that you aren't willing to do for them. Friendship is a two-way street. Not one-way.
Make sure that it is and that the street-signs and the traffic signals are all working properly lest when you are in need no one can find or
no one will want to find you.
no one will want to find you.
The internet is fantastic. I spend a lot of time on it, and enjoy it...but it can and often does cheapen and denigrate what used to be known as friendship. In the race for numbers, while the quantity of those we know online has ballooned the quality of the relationships that are forged on the internet is often a pale silhouette of those that we used to have offline, back in the day and not that long ago. Five years, maybe.
A silhouette. A negative to put it in photographic terms and negative pretty much sums it up cause that kind of relationship IS a negative most of the time.
DON'T THINK OF THE INTERNET AS A PLAYGROUND ALONE...& DON'T THINK IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO MAKE & HAVE FRIENDS THERE.
I have friends on the internet that are FAR more true to the idea of what a friend is than many if not most of the people I know offline. People who offered to drop everything and come here to help when my mother was dying...something that NOBODY around here EVER did.
I know people online that I have NEVER met in person (although I have met a few), and yet...I know. I can count on them. That old rubber hits the road crap. I know they got my back. I cannot say that about anyone i know in person around here, save one...and I am married to him. Not people I have known all my life. NOT ONE. Cause they have PROVED they don't care about me and never will.
So, the next time you blow off someone JUST BECAUSE they are online, think again. You just might be dismissing the best friend you could ever hope to have.
I UNDERSTAND GROUPIES &
THE CULTURE OF FOLLOWERS
A silhouette. A negative to put it in photographic terms and negative pretty much sums it up cause that kind of relationship IS a negative most of the time.
DON'T THINK OF THE INTERNET AS A PLAYGROUND ALONE...& DON'T THINK IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO MAKE & HAVE FRIENDS THERE.
I have friends on the internet that are FAR more true to the idea of what a friend is than many if not most of the people I know offline. People who offered to drop everything and come here to help when my mother was dying...something that NOBODY around here EVER did.
I know people online that I have NEVER met in person (although I have met a few), and yet...I know. I can count on them. That old rubber hits the road crap. I know they got my back. I cannot say that about anyone i know in person around here, save one...and I am married to him. Not people I have known all my life. NOT ONE. Cause they have PROVED they don't care about me and never will.
So, the next time you blow off someone JUST BECAUSE they are online, think again. You just might be dismissing the best friend you could ever hope to have.
I UNDERSTAND GROUPIES &
THE CULTURE OF FOLLOWERS
I am a well-known person so I know the feeling of having groupies. I respect them and appreciate them. But I NEVER confuse them with being FRIENDS. They are two different things. The hundreds/thousands of people who follow me on social media? Again, I appreciate them but amazingly have little to zilch contact (with perhaps the exception of the random 'poke', the rare hello, or even rarer a short conversation). Amazing or maybe NOT so amazing or hard to understand. We have always had and always will have people who follow
the star. Follow the famous. Follow the seemingly important people in our society. It's human nature I guess. But I go back again to the matter of what IS real friendship? It is NOT you being adored for being the
'New Kid In Town', cause tomorrow
or next week you won't be and
THEY will be GONE.
the star. Follow the famous. Follow the seemingly important people in our society. It's human nature I guess. But I go back again to the matter of what IS real friendship? It is NOT you being adored for being the
'New Kid In Town', cause tomorrow
or next week you won't be and
THEY will be GONE.
That is a pretty empty and lonely place when it happens the first time. The act of being UNfriended and UNfollowed can be devastating to someone who attaches their own self-worth to that fleeting moment of fame. It would be far better if it had never happened, perhaps...but it can be a learning experience and a wake-up call to the smart.
Learn from that. Learn the VALUE of friendship.
Learn what that term really means. Let yourself experience it, and you will never want to go back to the games people play in terms of relationships where nobody ever truly wins and nobody has any worth within them, save for the temporary moment and then it and you
are history to them.
are history to them.
Treasure the FRIEND. Cherish the person in your life you know is a friend. Hug them tight and never let them go. You might not need them today, but sooner or later (life being what it is)...you will. Oh yes you will. Will they be there? Will you have a shoulder to cry or lean on? A sympathetic ear? A pair of arms around you when NOTHING ELSE will feel as good?
YES, if YOU have been a friend in return. That's the way it works. GIVE as good as you get. Hug them, laugh with them, more importantly cry with them. Get mad WITH them...
not AT them.
Most of all, TELL THEM you love them, care about them, and will always be there for them.
not AT them.
Most of all, TELL THEM you love them, care about them, and will always be there for them.
That is what they call insurance. Yep. That insures that they will be and do the same for and with and to you. FOREVER!
IT DOESN'T GET ANY BETTER THAN THAT!
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BEST-SELLING AUTHOR DYLAN S LE MAIRE PUBLISHES TWO NEWSPAPERS
WHICH APPEAR DAILY/WEEKLY
THE DUSTYBEAR POST
&
THE DUSTYBEAR POST & JOURNAL
THINK YOU WILL ENJOY MY MATE'S NEWSPAPER TOO...
BEST-SELLING AUTHOR DYLAN S LE MAIRE PUBLISHES TWO NEWSPAPERS
WHICH APPEAR DAILY/WEEKLY
THE DUSTYBEAR POST
&
THE DUSTYBEAR POST & JOURNAL
THINK YOU WILL ENJOY MY MATE'S NEWSPAPER TOO...
THE COMBAT JOURNAL
for the best reporting out of Afghanistan,
but not limited to news OF Afghanistan.
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*The picture at the top is of two sibling Bears, brothers...and presents a picture of Bears seldom seen by humans.
The most prevalent misconception about Bears is that they are dumb, vicious, unteachable and sometimes considered virtually evil. That could NOT be further from the truth.
In truth, Bears by and large are very intelligent. Very sensitive, talented, and caring animals.
Monogamous and family-oriented,
like humans at least should be.
Among their own they can be capable of incredible tenderness.
Make no mistake. In the wild, they ARE wildlife...and should be approached with caution. Like any other wildlife, you are probably not going to be able to gain their trust...and when confronted with what they may deem a threat (you discovered in THEIR habitat), they will react accordingly. Pretty much as you would if you came upon an intruder in YOUR home.
But to leave it at that does a great disservice to BOTH humans AND Bears.
for the best reporting out of Afghanistan,
but not limited to news OF Afghanistan.
_____________________________
*The picture at the top is of two sibling Bears, brothers...and presents a picture of Bears seldom seen by humans.
The most prevalent misconception about Bears is that they are dumb, vicious, unteachable and sometimes considered virtually evil. That could NOT be further from the truth.
In truth, Bears by and large are very intelligent. Very sensitive, talented, and caring animals.
Monogamous and family-oriented,
like humans at least should be.
Among their own they can be capable of incredible tenderness.
Make no mistake. In the wild, they ARE wildlife...and should be approached with caution. Like any other wildlife, you are probably not going to be able to gain their trust...and when confronted with what they may deem a threat (you discovered in THEIR habitat), they will react accordingly. Pretty much as you would if you came upon an intruder in YOUR home.
But to leave it at that does a great disservice to BOTH humans AND Bears.
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Bear, you are so right. Can't add a thing!
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